Intimacy in sex


All my feelings have the colour you desire to paint. ~Rumi

What do you think is intimacy? Lying in bed, naked, making out? What is the exact connotation of intimacy? I looked up the Thesaurus, but nothing did justice to the concept I am carrying around in my mind.

Intimacy is not nakedness. Intimacy is not sex. Intimacy is not making out in the rain. I agree, all of those could become perfectly intimate moments, but most often they are not allowed to reach their full potential.

I know I have experienced this intimacy. I know I have a very intimate relationship with my man. But even with some my other lovers, I have felt intimacy.

Intimacy comes from a place of total surrender and I don’t mean the S&M way where one becomes a sub or a Dom. No, I mean a space that is created with energetic vibrations that allows for two individuals to renounce their singular selves and become united as ONE.

ONENESS is where everything is headed. Which is why sex is so magical. It can show you a glimpse of that UNITY. And wow, is that beautiful!

Intimacy can only come if you are connected on a soul level. Even though you might have had sex with that hunky guy, but felt hollow afterwards..why? The sex was amazing, but it was still not intimate. The sparks were flying, but it was not of the higher frequency.

But some lovers feel like “home”. Yes when you make love to them, it is like fucking coming home. Everything makes sense in that moment of passionate embrace. The intensity, the excitement, the soul connection…it drives you crazy and it feels just right.

Like its meant to be. What heights of sexual intensity! What exciting new experimentation in bed! The chemistry is sizzling and all the time there is this feeling of knowing him/her, being in this position with him/her, loving him/her with every atom of your body! Have you not felt this?

I was never up for marriage. The fact that I am going to fuck one man for the rest of my life while he gives me home, security and food is not up my alley. But it happened and I don’t regret it. I never take sex as an obligation.

I don’t think I have to fuck him just because he is my husband. I want to do it and experience intimate moments with him which is why I do it. You have to first understand how you approach sex to correct any imbalances in your sex life.

If you want to explore sex as a deeper journey of the human consciousness, then see that person as a soul. Not just a soul, but a part of that ONE SOUL from which we have all emanated. Yes we are ONE! So once you set this parameter, then no sex can be cheap. No encounter becomes humiliating!

You are uniting in divine sexual energy exchange with another soul to experience the beauty of the yin/yang! How fucking sublime is that!

Sweety, change your perspective. If a woman is somehow lessened because she slept with you, then seriously dude, it is you who needs much soul searching. You cock cannot debase a woman. No in fact it energises her. Just like her pussy energises you when you allow divine sexual bliss to happen.

Being conscious is everything. In the moment. Looking into his eyes, feeling his breath, smelling him…you need to be aware! Fucking Zen master style! As your awareness is concentrated, you will begin to see and feel so much!

Feelings you have never felt. Sensations you have never enjoyed. Put it in the backseat. Your pleasure that is! Stop being selfish in love. It can never work. Think of giving him/her the most pleasure and then you will see that you have become ONE with the pleasure. You have become the pleasure and the pleaser and in all of this, you will become the pleased.

Surrender my Beloved! Dance with him- naked. Feel the wind on your skin, the sun rays kissing your naked body while you twirl in the most delicious dance of existence. Kiss him like it is the last thing you will do. Even if it is some dude you met a week ago and things are not going that great.

If you have kept up your relationship with him, then invest this time and effort because this not only makes the moment divine, but it helps you tremendously in your psychological/spiritual and physical journey. If you treat the experience as sacred, my sweets, it becomes sacred.

There can be no guilt, no shame, no judgement…it is just sacred. With each divine lovemaking experience, you are opening yourself up to finally become the COSMIC LOVER of all. Not to love and be loved in return…but just to LOVE.

For being in LOVE is our natural state. Like JUST BEING. Breathing, loving…it is the same. Take sex to become the tool for your metamorphosis into becoming a DIVINE LOVER OF ALL. In fact, after a certain point of expressing this love…you will have become that love. That love is samadhi. That love is God, Christos, Krishna, Sunyata, Allah!!!

Accept your lover as an expression of the INTELLIGENT DESIGN that birthed the galaxies, the nebulae, the ginormous space structures that we humans can only gawk at. Look at him like he is the only man on Earth. Stop thinking of other people. That not only insults his soul, but is very damaging to yours.

Guys I suggest you do this too. Make her feel like she is the ONLY WOMAN ALIVE at that point when you are making love to her. Bare yourself to her. Cry, sing, dance…basically don’t let societal norms and mores hold your divine masculine in. Don’t box him him.

The DIVINE MASCULINE is wounded. The DIVINE FEMININE has to save him for he is here to save her. We are here with each other, for each other and we are in each other.

All the polarities are within. The Universe is within. BARE YOUR SOUL people!! Lay it out there and feel the catharsis when you make love. It is sublime. Let the CHI flow as it wants to. Observe it and you will see how energy bonds with energy to create something magical, sometimes it births a whole new reality!

Your body is the vessel of the COSMIC SOUL. It speaks through the rhythms of our bodies, the pulsations. Let the waves of cosmic desire surface in your consciousness, feel them ride through your groins and express that potency as a powerful orgasm to return divine love and ecstasy back to the Universe. It will change your whole POV(point of view).

Guys, enter your woman with your soul energy. And women, accept his cock inside you with your soul energy. The heart chakra is to be operational here. Do not expect him to play into standard patriarchal roles and do not restrict yourself to typical female roles that society has shoved on us. Do not label or play roles. 

JUST BE! He is in your life to create a sacred vibrational space for your soul growth, as you are going to do for him. These feelings are so sublime and profound that human comprehension is dwarfed in front of them. No words can adequately describe what a conscious sexual relationship can do.

You’ve just got to feel it. Feel it…It is the most magical thing you can do for yourself! Love and honour the sacredness of sex. Hold each other- tightly. So tight that both your breaths become one. Breathe together and stay in the moment. 

No thinking of tomorrow. No thoughts of where this is going. Nothing. If those thoughts come, smile at them and watch them without passion. Without you provoking, thoughts are powerless. Just use all your concentration of the five senses to be AWARE. 

Watch how you feel. If at any point you feel cheapened in any way, respectfully say no. Make sure you are always in the position to say no. Never go through the sexual act if your soul says no. In such cases, you may attract entities with lower vibrations who can feed on your energy. 

Give each other strength! Strength to express themselves to become who they are meant to be. To be aligned with their soul purpose. Work on each other with your touch, kisses and your tongue. Make sure you have set aside enough time to let her become fully aroused before intercourse.

Set aside at least twenty minutes for that! Do not rush sex. Do not cheat yourself or her/him!

With Venus going retrograde many issues on love and intimacy will surface and this time you should make sure you have ticked everything off the list to move on to the next level. When Venus goes retro, we usually tend to experience love and sex pretty intensely and the journey is mostly internal.

To work through these issues, Venus challenges us to understand INTIMACY. That one word can change everything in your life…but you have to allow the magic of intimacy to wash over your you. 

You can do meditations on intimacy…become intimate with everything…how? Say you love the North Star! Stare at it every night. Begin to talk to it. Tell it all your secrets and feel, truly feel intimate with it. You can do this with all things.

Your personal things will be easier to make intimate. But try this with the world around you…

If you have any questions about sacred sexuality, feel free to email me – tina@tinaheals.com

Feel feel to comment, share and like…thank you!

Loved-Couple-Intimacy-Nude-Painting-Abstract-Body-Art-Palette-Knife-Oil-Picture-for-Home-Hotel-Wall

 

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Sex is a multidimensional creative and spiritual act!!!

16707304_10155001164674450_3286114529445172152_oThe way in which any given culture treats the vagina — whether with respect or disrespect, caringly or disparagingly — is a metaphor for how women in general in that place and time are treated…NAOMI WOLF

How does our society treat pussy? Hahahahaha…

I am going straight to it. I will talk about the cunt/pussy/vagina. What words come to your mind? Abuse? Belittling? To denote a coward!

To this, I have to quote Betty Davis. Didn’t she say that balls are weak? They are fragile and hurt easily. Compare it to a vag. The vag is equipped to pop out a child for fuck’s sake! That is like some fifty four fractures happening in one go.

Forget the theory! I laboured for seventeen hours, so I know how painful it can get. I had begun to cultivate a friendship with my pussy over the months of my pregnancy. It happened organically.

A conversation started which made me write my book Pussy Talks. Yes I am looking to publish it and share my experiences with the world.

I have been gathering sex stories from men and women for over six years now. It started off as a research project for a script, but became an obsession soon. Exploring people’s sexual memories with them can have a profound effect on the psyche.

It is absurd the way sex is perceived. It is shown to be immoral, only for procreating and blah, blah. In fact, it is in conflict with some of our highest ideals and aspirations.

Why? What is so disgusting or disturbing about sex?

When people talk about the moments they have orgasmed, or the moment they kissed not only the mouths, but the souls too, there is a certain vibration that is created. I am very aware of vibrations, energy and frequencies I pick up. This subject became of great interest to me.

The stories I collected from hundreds of people were not just of orgasms and great sex. There were moments of pain, separation, dejection, humiliation. But what was interesting is that sex is actually the very fundamental on which society operates.

Whether we are ready to consciously acknowledge it or not, I don’t know, but sex is a huge part of our lives. Studies show that men think of sex pretty much most of the times and trust me, going by my data, women don’t fall short either.

If not, often times women crave for sex much more, but are ashamed and guilty of admitting it. Yes society has scared us into thinking that if we women think of sex or feel sexual then we are nymphos. Bad, bad, women. Lock them up, grab them by the pussies and burn them at the stake.

If nothing so severe, harm her by maligning her reputation, spread online gossip. Or maybe even throw acid on her face. Fuck knows who these morons are, but they exist.

Watch how we spend so much getting wasted in nightclubs and pubs, talking to strangers whom we may not like, but what is going on in our heads? How do I touch her exposed abs? How do I touch his biceps? We play so many games of coquetry and crap, that it is time, we acted more like grown ups and claimed our sexuality.

During sex, most of us are scared to reveal their inner most self. The vulnerable self. We spend more time trying to hide who we are. Men play into machismo tropes whereas women play into being the role he likes her in the most. I mean in most cases, I have seen this.

Very few women actually have told me that they speak to their guys about their intimate sexual fantasies. I do. I cannot not tell my partner. And he does the same. We are so much stronger for this. Because from day 1, I made it clear to him that this is who I am and I love sex. The rubbing together of organs, the kisses, the penetration, everything leads up to a climactic point where I can just BE and explore all of myself.

Use sex as a grounding mechanism to remind you of how perfect we humans are in our imperfections and ultimately that is what being human means- in all its rich messiness, desires and longings.

Why is PUSSY a derogatory word? Our first step to reclaim our sacred sexuality will be to understand the word PUSSY/VAGINA.

Listen your pussy is not only connected to the brain, but is a part of your soul. Yes it is. It is sacred and it is the very seat of your feminine powers.

Sex in today’s world is just a physiological experience, driven by evolution, some would argue. But while gathering data, I sensed that the most elevating sexual experiences were shared with a like-minded individual who understands what existence means to us and shares our vision and journey. The excitement when two such souls share sexual energy is erotic and filled with creative and spiritual potency.

There is a synergy between the mind-body(brain and pussy), consciousness and the sexual urge or LIBIDO. Yes sex is a biological act, but ask yourself that have you never felt the poetics behind sex? Have you never felt a spiritual ecstasy that drops the EGO-SELF and transforms the two players to ABSOLUTE UNION!

It’s a Science and it is Spirituality! Sex influences every aspect of our being. It can be a cause of stress or a tool to address stress. The question is how do you link biology to BEING!

Once one understands what scientists at the most advanced laboratories and clinics around the world are confirming — that the vagina and the brain are essentially one network, or “one whole system,” as they tend to put it, and that the vagina mediates female confidence, creativity, and sense of transcendence — the answers to many of these seeming mysteries fall into place…Naomi Wolf

Women, your pelvic nerve is a superhighway of info that passes from the base of the spine to the cervix, connecting it to the brain and this “superhighway”is unique for every woman! And very advanced. This is why we women have such different sexual trigger points.

Some like their feet nibbled, some like breast play, some are into heavy kissing and touching, you get the plot. But the guys in comparison, have a way more simpler neural network in their pelvic area. Do you see how this piece of info completely overturns the widely accepted patriarchal sexual norms? Do you see how we women have been duped for centuries into believing that we don’t want sex?

We are now fully convinced that WOMEN DO NOT LIKE SEX. They just “do it” to please men. But friends…the interviews and data that I have been collecting screams bloody murder at this perversion of a biological reality.

Women, we have to UNLEARN these toxic lies we have been fed. I know by now we have digested the info, assimilated it and we now as a collective, fully BELIEVE IN IT. Women who like sex are vamps, fallen women, sluts, bitches, whores.

I know sex in this modern world is hard where images of perfect bodies crowd our psyche as we are about to get naked and in bed, ready to get intimate. And here we have men, born and bred, in the pornographic culture where the sexual act is concentrated on her tits and pussy. It is a linear narrative and then wham, bam, it is over! For women this is severely disappointing.

The media is feeding you non stop with subliminal prompts, binding you to this dense 3D reality by feeding your reptilian brain. This part takes care of your primary functions. They have reduced SEX to this vibration when it is clearly not so. Sex is a multidimensional creative and spiritual act.

The quintessential woman wants to play and be played with. She does not care for a quickie. This does not involve all her neurological sexual systems and leaves her unsatisfied. See, her whole body has to be involved while making love. My most fulfilling sexual experiences have been when I have managed to enter an altered state of consciousness. Yes, like with psychedelics! 😉

We women are like the shamans who have to feel fully connected and invoked to enter the sacred sexual space. In our minds, in our bodies. My most transcendent orgasms have come when I have managed to enter the dimensional vortex. Where I have lost myself, only to find myself again. But this time, I was a new person.

When sex becomes just a physiological sensation, then this aspect of out-of-body experience can get lost. In a two minute quickie you cannot grasp the beauty of the cosmos. You just feel the physical sensations and maybe mental, because the man is probably your partner, but you will never experience such transcendental bliss and awareness.

Life can be an orgasm! At least for me and some women I have worked with. Sometimes, I get so turned on by music or art or even a conversation. I like to stay in this orgasmic bliss as much as I can. My whole body begins to vibrate. My Pussy feels so aware, so awake. Such an energetic being! My sexual energy is at the peak when I know I am valued by my partner and my emotional and spiritual needs are being cared for.

Even if you are into one-night stands or sexual exploration, you can enrich your life by just being aware of each encounter and treating it like a spiritual act. You can begin by showing respect and love to your woman, even if it is for a brief moment. Best be clear of your intentions.

Sex is a tool. You can use it to achieve spiritual and psycho-somatic well being. But how? By staying PRESENT in the moment. By not being in another place, with another person. This not only insults your partner in front, but also closes you up to the possibility of creating something magical at that moment. More coming up in the book and the workshops.

My suggestion is, change your attitude to sex. No it is not just a physiological function, it is so much more. Do not be scared of it or do not feel guilty if you have sexual desires and thoughts. And even if you are in a relationship, it is perfectly alright to feel attracted to someone else.

The question is…what do you do with that attraction? Sometimes even when we feel sexual chemistry, it could also mean that the person is from our soul group. You know we all have soul groups- 144 souls in one. 12 into 12. But if your attraction hurts your partner, then it is time to start a mature dialogue.

Your partner has also felt similar feelings, but most of us will never accept it. Not even to ourselves. If you truly value the relationship you are in, you will never act on your impulses. But it is important to realise that these feelings exist! Sexual attraction and desire are absolutely NORMAL!

It is natural to have FB crushes and feel horny looking at someone you fancy, because our brains and pussies are inter-connected ladies. If we like someone mentally, we can feel sexual towards them and it may have nothing to do with their six packs.

In this rape culture, women are sexually stressed all the time. Rapes, molestation, cat calls…they go on. Which is why women are so hyper-stressed. Korean researchers have shown that when a female mouse is sexually stressed over time, she not only becomes cantankerous and angry, but her vaginal tissues also start deteriorating. Can you imagine what is happening to u s women in this culture?

Every time we hear a salacious comment, we are inhibiting dopamine receptors from producing this chemical which makes us happy, creative and confident. Every time some presses our boobs in the subway or in local trains, our pussy is actually feeling this as a tremendous painful shock.

We may not understand the implications…but this is what has turned women into enablers of patriarchy. This hurt they have been taking on for ages has resulted in the objectification of the pussy into something ugly, hideous and grotesque.

It is time to change all that. The pussy is beautiful for fuck’s sake. No matter what it looks like or where it is in the maiden, mother or crone stage. It does not fucking matter! The pussy is divine and it is about time we women and men, society as a collective realised and accepted this. What healing can occur!!!

When Donald Trump said, “GRAB THEM BY THE PUSSY”…he hurt all of us collectively. Yes…men and women. For women it is more obvious. Why? Because blood circulation in the pussy constricts when she feels threatened!! So by demeaning the pussy, he sent a direct signal to our brains that we are not safe.

Our bodies are not safe. Our reproductive rights are not ours. We are smaller, so we get less pay…the misogynistic saga continues!

But who is going to change all this? So much hurt, so much pain? If we muster enough compassion for the wounded masculine, we can heal him. With sex, with love, with our feminine powers, our yin energy.

The first step must be to heal ourselves, our pussies and our own wounds. For when this healing occurs, you will look at the world anew. After much study, experimentation, meditation and experience, I have devised a MEDITATION MODULE called the WOMB JOURNEY! This has been very beneficial to loads of women I have shared this with.

If you look around, you see all these relationships. Somehow most appear as shallow, selfish, possessive, jealous, controlling. But how often do you see a well balanced relationship?

A woman who understands that her man has unresolved skeletons in his closet should make it a point to help him address those issues. If you leave them there and don’t speak about everything, then they can become deadly dangerous. If you can get your man to own these emotional issues, they will give him focus, courage and direction.

In fact, a true conversation can change a man’s life. But in most cases, you have to initiate it and of course you both must be open enough to discuss potentially disturbing and personal issues.

In most cases, it is the woman, with her feminine wisdom that must align her man to his spiritual power. This could be a painful process. Even during sex, it is up to you to let your man free. In his mind and in his body and soul, he should feel free. Don’t try to tame your partner’s sexuality!

If you feel like you want to explore some issues but your partner is not willing to, then it is up to you to see what is worth more. However, you must never emotionally blackmail your partner into doing sexual acts they are not comfortable with.

A true sexual experience is all about FREEDOM…such potent freedom that you lose the sense that you are caged in a fleshy body. All the toxic mores and customs, ideas and traditions your man has picked up, can be unlearned.

A man can be shown the true potency of the sacred feminine. This does not mean you “mother” him. For fuck’s sake, a woman who mothers her man, is not acting from her sacred yoni space. This does not mean that you cannot act motherly towards your man. In fact, you should play all the roles when needed.

Just make sure, you don’t get caught in the vicious mothering cycle. It is thankless and will drain your SACRAL CHAKRA. When a woman’s sacral chakra is in balance, she appears magnetic. Sex here can be a conduit for resolving all his unresolved emotional baggage. You can HEAL him. Even if he is a random encounter.

After sex, you can release all his pain and issues to the Universe as it could harm your energy field. Compress them in a tiny box. Go to the ends of the Earth(in your mind) and bury it. The Earth takes all these vibrations of pain and releases them to the 5D awareness as holographic plants. You should visualise this process and see these holograms bloom! The pain has been released!!!

Mother earth has a wild side by responding and reacting in the moment, in the NOW. Discerning is a moment by moment dynamic play…available through being connected to yourself to discern what is true in the moment. But no matter, even if it a drunken sexcapade, you can make it a spiritual experience.

Intent is all that matters. The intent to heal and love with sex.  How can we go wrong there? If intention can change the molecular structure of water, then what do you think it can do to us? How much water are we? 50% to 65%! Yes we humans are mostly water!

So what have you gleaned from this article? Don’t think about it. There is no understanding it like 2+2=4. It is not so simple you see. The thinker is caught in the thinking feedback loop and she is trying to escape the pain. The thinker does not have all the mysteries of existence. The thinker is like Kafka’s gatekeeper.

“Before the law sits a gatekeeper. To this gatekeeper comes a man from the country who asks to gain entry into the law. But the gatekeeper says that he cannot grant him entry at the moment. The man thinks about it and then asks if he will be allowed to come in later on. ‘It is possible,’ says the gatekeeper, ‘but not now.’”..NOT NOW!!???

The man’s challenge was to try and get past the gatekeeper in order to get to the law. Eventually the man becomes old and dies without ever gaining access to the law. Before the man dies, the gatekeeper tells him that the entrance was made just for the man and since the man is now dying the entrance to the law will also be closed! See how perverse it all is!

Thinking will not allow you to enter this space of sacred sexuality. In this space, everything is love…yes ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE!! Love will make us peal off all the layers and create sexual alchemy. From this alchemical process will something magical be born.

With a love that is all encompassing and divine, we can begin to heal and become a society that treats the pussy with respect, symbolising all women are treated too with respect and love.

But what if we did not have sex? Fuck! What then? All I can say is that we would be invulnerable! And what is life without the human vulnerabilities? Where is the ridiculousness of it all? We would definitely not have much in content for our films, soaps and books! And what of all the Buzzfeed relationship gyan? Lots of us would be without work or ambition! Lol!

Sex creates chaos. A chaos that is necessary. As it is from this chaos, that magic happens…

Enough already…Fuck everything else, start loving yourself and your pussy. Touch her, speak with her and become friends. Trust me it works…

More on becoming friends with your pussy…watch this space for the release of my book Pussy Talks and if this topic interests you, contact me, support me, like, share and comment.

Pussy Talks

Notes on Channelling Ishtar

I am writing to you the experience of channelling Ishtar. I had gone through so much of channelled writing and am in the habit of writing without thought. Just lines and words that come to me. Floating by. Visualising Ishtar/Innana.

Track  comes to mind- Isis, Ishtar, Diana, Hecate.

Lunar Goddesses. Moon. Fecundity. Womanhood. Menstruation.

Ishtar’s energy is in those words…how did Ishtar learn? Pain, sufferring, stripping away of possessions. Things being taken away. Red. Red. Red. The colour is very prominent as I think of the Goddess. Blood….I see blood everywhere in my mind’s eye.

Is it because she was the Goddess of war? She was the goddess of love too. Thinking of her at war on her lion. Parallel- Durga. Mahishashura? Ishtar defied patriarchy.

Love and sex. I concentrate on the cosmic yoni. My yoni as a symbol of that divine energy. Warmth. A connection. When I enter meditation now, the third eye is vibrating. I will get off the comp for a bit. BRB.

The meditative state lasted for about seven minutes. However, my consciousness was somewhat suspended. In fact I have no memory of how time went. I am now staring at the keyboard and thinking of how to get the messages across. Sometimes in states of meditation I have entered realms.

Armed with a diary, I have traversed many psychic realms and seen entities. Spoken to them through thought meditation. I have met my grandparents and some other ancestors as well. More than ever those abilities returned to me with childbirth.

Never having made sense of my visions, voices, colours and sounds, I kept them hidden away as I went about trying to get life going. They often became disfigured ghosts of my consciousness. I repressed them further till they became a tsunami and crashed my consciousness. Restart.

They returned with childbirth and I have embraced them. I have finally claimed them as my demons and I am making friends with them. Since I got pregnant, I’ve been keeping journals. Handwritten notes. Doodles. Anything that comes to me from the higher realms.

I’ve been practising channelling Kwan Yin as well.

So as I try to type unconsciously, no words are coming to me except a kinda white fuzzy field where I can drift off in meditation. I will not give up. I know her energy is accessible in that fuzzy ball in my mind. Ishtar/Innana I invoke you…awaken through me…

Chaos and fertility- I can sense these two central polarities heavily.

War and love. But is war only chaos? Is life not chaos? Is the quantum reality not chaos?

Look at the DOUBLE SLIT EXPERIMENT. The wave particle duality….THE OBSERVER! Everything is energy right? My thought forms too. Tulpas they are called. ALEXANDRA DAVID NEEL did a whole lot of experimentation with the TULPAS.

A tulpa, according to traditional Tibetan doctrines, is an entity created by an act of imagination, rather like the fictional characters of a novelist, except that tulpas are not written down. David-Neel became so interested in the concept that she decided to try to create one. Her experiment went AWOL as her tulpa began to manifest without her summoning him. OMG!!! Yes all those horror stories your mind can conjure, they all can come true.

Like all those INTERNET MONSTERS. Like the SLENDER MAN are all TULPAS created by writers. I can tell you this is true because I have lived day and night with the characters I have created for my novels, screenplays, plays, short stories. They have all come alive.

So now I, the observer creates ISHTAR, the tulpa. All fine and dandy. But I cannot create a tulpa in a day, so I have to intuitively sense her energies and keep typing. THINK WITHOUT THINKING…Yes that’s my new mojo.

Somehow I feel that her journey to the netherworld is where I have to look to find my answers. I have to seek out what lies in the murky depths of my UNCONSCIOUS. Could that be the reason I am looking at ISHTAR so deeply?4585746524_328x443

 

 

 

INTRODUCTION ON CHANNELLING ISHTAR

Bigger than the mountains am I,

The Empress of the gods am I

The Queen of heaven am I

The earth’s mistress am I.

(translation of an old Babylonian text)

This is a special channelling session for I am summoning Ishtar as I do my Ishta Devi. I am integrating Ishtar’s energy into the Dasamahavidya. Kali, Tara, Shodoshi, Bhubaneshwari, Bhairavi, Chinnamasta, Dhumavati, Balaga, Matangi, Kamala, the ten energies of the Mulaprakriti.

The solitary ray dropping into the mother deep may be taken as meaning Divine Thought or Intelligence, impregnating chaos. This, however, occurs on the plane of metaphysical abstraction, or rather the plane whereon that which we call a metaphysical abstraction is a reality. The Virgin-egg being in one sense abstract Egg-ness, or the power of becoming developed through fecundation, is eternal and for ever the same. And just as the fecundation of an egg takes place before it is dropped; so the non-eternal periodical germ which becomes later in symbolism the mundane egg, contains in itself, when it emerges from the said symbol, “the promise and potency” of all the Universe. Though the idea per se is, of course, an abstraction, a symbolical mode of expression, it is a symbol truly, as it suggests the idea of infinity as an endless circle. It brings before the mind’s eye the picture of Kosmos emerging from and in boundless space, a Universe as shoreless in magnitude if not as endless in its objective manifestation…HPB

The Cosmic Yoni is the concretisation of these Mahavidyas. My tantric diksha took place a few years ago as I was given my mantras by my tantric guru. Great man who helped shape my spiritual journey along with a few other SPIRITUAL GUIDES I have like MAHAVATAR BABAJI and the sages of GYANGANJ.

I am calling upon Ishtar, today through the Kali yantra. I have solar motifs. Crystals, incense and the works.

Let me begin by telling you about my attraction to Ishtar. The books of Zachariah Sitchin popped into my hands before I hit my teens. Those theories fascinated me and got me looking into most of the truther stuff of the later years. Ishtar was introduced to me.

My tireless, never-ending research began…and as I delved more into her, I felt like I was being pulled into whirlpool of energy. Something familiar. Something known and loved. Her affiliation to the animal kingdom and her being who she is and what she stands for makes me want to know her. The wisdom in her COSMIC YONI!! And I totally believed Ishtar/Innana to be one of the aliens who created and ruled over humanity.

Okay I was troubled about the fact that we humans needed to be ruled over and that they created hybrids who would be the masters of the human populace, the veil was lifted and I smelled colonialism and its toxicity all over again. But that did not keep me from Ishtar. In fact my interest in her got deeper.

By the time I was completing my college, I had written a play on Ishtar with mixed media. I was thinking AR/VR prototypes then! Funny how the cosmic MIND imprints you with ideas, thoughts, suggestions…

This play was called THE JOURNEY OF ISHTAR and it charted her descent into the Netherworld. Her journey through the netherworld became an allegory for my life. I began to see patterns unfold. Of the same pain and shame Ishtar went through. Her nakedness became a metaphor for the ABSTRACT DARK SPACE or ULTIMATE REALITY I was calling out to Ishtar, the light bringer. The fact that her reign was not characterised by that of a consort attracted me. DUMUZI, her man literally lost his life and penis after she fixed with death’s gaze…hahahaha! What’s with men and their cocks?4585746524_328x443

All through HIS-STORY we see women little more than objects or trophies. But it is her and her kin like Hatshepsut, Cleopatra that we have seen the Queen portrayed as something more than just a mannequin.

Yet while I watch the show CROWN on Netflix, I cannot help by see how Elizabeth has always been a puppet. Yes they do try to show her coming up against the system as a feminine role model, yet, I do not see her as such a role model. In fact, she appears as an ENABLER OF PATRIARCHY. So not much to talk about there.

My Lady abandoned heaven and earth to descend to the underworld.
Inanna abandoned heaven and earth to descend to the underworld.
She abandoned her office of holy priestess to descend to the underworld….

This is what her slave writes about Ishtar and this descent to the UNDERWORLD has been a sort of lingering trope in my life. Saturn in the Eighth house. Yes a macabre obsession with DEATH  and REBIRTH. Complete bad-ass Pluto energy which makes me go to the proverbial UNDERWORLD repeatedly to seek myself.

This obsessive fantasy about facing death head on and surviving is a very Plutonian energy that I challenge and of course Saturn beaming my EIGHTH.

Anyway, Ishtar/Innana took me through this psychological journey of archetypes many times. Through the play, through channelled poetry, through meditation…I have invoked Innana.

Today I call upon Ishtar through the Kali Yantra. Is that possible?

I know of her animal shamanism. She channelled animal spirits. Protected the animal world. She also shows us the power they have. Yes this stuff is dangerous, but hey what is not “dangerous”? We have to investigate to get at the crux of the matter.

I know Ishtar’s energies are active in me. My love of animals, facing death and devastation during my tenure as an animal activist with AWA. I still work with street animals. Regularly visit shelters and sanctuaries. And of course I have my own family of rescues.

The Lion! I am a Leo Sun and Ascendant. Vedic Kundli says my Lagna is Simha or LION! And I have four planets in Leo! Including my Mercury. So there all that fifth house related stuff gets a full energetic makeover. Ishtar is associated with SHAMASH, the SOLAR GOD. The Sun is the ruler of LEO!

I am not much of a ritualist. I perform a lot of rituals mentally, like my Shiva Puja and a few homas. Yes I do mental homas. Manas puja. You can try it too. Watch a homa on Youtube. For me its very easy as my Guru in Calcutta does Dasamahavidya homas, Mahamrityunjaya homas, kala sarpa dasa homas in our ashram.

Being blessed, I have performed several important homas there like Chinnamasta, Dhumavati and Kalabhairav and Bagala homa. So I have them in my mind, the whole scene, the mantras, the collective chanting it, the warmth from the flames coming alive by my Guru pouring sacred ghee in it, the smell of incense, the bhakti of the hundreds gathered. It is mystical. The faith. The belief. All of it. And then on all that my Guru’s voice reciting the mantra….I have all of it, in my mind. It’s there stored away in my MIND PALACE.

Ready to be accessed and used anytime. So you find your ideal homa and you can do it too. Manas puja is very sacred. In fact our progenitors created MANAS PUTRAS or the MIND BORN.

In the Mandukya (Mundaka) Upanishad it is written, “As a spider throws out and retracts its web, as herbs spring up in the ground . . . so is the Universe derived from the undecaying one” (I. 1. 7). Brahma, as “the germ of unknown Darkness,” is the material from which all evolves and develops “as the web from the spider, as foam from the water,” etc. This is only graphic and true, if Brahma the “Creator” is, as a term, derived from the root brih, to increase or expand. Brahma “expands” and becomes the Universe woven out of his own substance. The Pitris are lunar deities and our ancestors, because they created the physical man…HPB

So literally Brahma made himself from himself, or his mind, because everything is spiritual and has no dense body. Thoughts create you. So never underestimate the power of your MIND- conscious and more so, the UNCONSCIOUS for therein lies the greatest mysteries.

For Ishtar, I have kept her image, you know the full length shot doing the rounds on the internet. I have kept the Kali yantra in front and am concentrating on it. After meditating on Ishtar and her life, I shall start writing…just channelling her energy. No editing. Oh of course there is LAPIZ LAZULI that I have placed inside the yantra. It is Ishtar’s favourite.

Then, after three days and three nights, Inanna had not returned,
Ninshubur set up a lament for her by the ruins.
She beat the drum for her in the assembly places.

Neither Enlil nor Inanna’s father Nannar, the Moon God of Ur, will help her because she has craved the below, and because those who choose the underworld do not return. Ninshubur succeeds in getting Enki to secure her release:

The story of Ushtar was inscribed on clay tablets at around 1750 BCE and what do we see?

Nothing changes. Patriarchy was as disinterested as it is today. As oppressive and  couldn’t-give-a-fuck as today. Lovely! Nothing changes.

But Ishtar still decides to go there…wonder what her chart looked like? Also the whole stripping away of her clothing and jewellery are signs that she is having to give up power and control. Allegorically it could mean she is shedding veils of ignorance and getting closer to wisdom. Nakedness signifies DEEP WISDOM and is used very much with regards to the feminine. Even the Dakinis, the naked sky dancers exhibit the feminine WISDOM. Like Kali who symbolises just that. Stripping away of all ignorance and falsities.

I love doing rituals for Kali, such intensity in her depths. Ishtar/Innana is ready to shed all her power. For what? I feel like her in so many ways. Ishtar’s journey is all about exploration and acceptance. She stares at the skeletons in her cupboard. She harmonises them and is triumphant! What a woman! I meant she is a woman like us all right? And we?? A goddess too…WE ARE ALL GODDESSES and that is a lesson.

There is very important documentation referring to the description of the constellation VIRGO, which has its origin in the ancient Assyrian-Babylonian culture. This constellation has always been female and has been especially associated with the tension between fertility and beauty. The BABYLONIANS associated this constellation with the goddess Ishtar, also well-known under the name of Ashtoreth or Astarte…This bit is just magic to my ears. MY VENUS IS IN VIRGO. So your Venus placement is important to check out. Sublime!

Ishtar is the Goddess of sex too. Now having Saturn in the Eight is quite an intense lesson. To be learnt in the arena of sex, death, rebirth, shared resources. Can sex and Saturn be even spoken of in the same sentence? Well, ask us…the SATURN IN THE 8TH people. We are a special breed.

Through us a lot of sexual information will be passed to the collective. The eighth house is one of such hardcore lessons- how do you share resources? Who are you in the deepest dark? What are your fears, anxieties, worries? Lastly how do you deal with them. Saturn teaches you…he is a strict task master. In India we say SHAM SHANISHCHARAYA NAMAHA to appease Saturn. You can try it too. And wear black, eat black rice. You can get in touch for more details as it is imperative to know where Shani is positioned in your chart.

Back to the scary EIGHTH HOUSE stuff- this is not some wishy-washy, light and frivolous house. These energies are intense. Now let Saturn decide to be there when you were born, then stuff gets really heavy and deep- murky, briny…but Saturn wants you to know how to swim out of that quagmire of your psyche full of fears, repression and anxiety. Somehow Saturn in the eight usually means that ideas that sex is dirty can be passed down from elders. This is your battle AND YOUR metamorphosis. You have to prove to yourself that SEX IS NOT UNHEALTHY.

We take INTIMACY seriously, like ISHTAR did and I see nothing wrong with that. I am on the quest of TRANSFORMING(SCORPIO) my FEARS(SATURN- LOW VIBRATION). This house is the gateway to my deepest psychological secrets and like Ishtar I am on a journey to understand the archetypes, tropes and imagery of the deep UNCONSCIOUS.

In fact this is why Tarot, Astrology and other divination modalities are so helping to me. They help me explore the PSYCHE. I love it. And having an occult leaning, I see how as above so below and nothing is real. A HOLOGRAM. That’s what this is…a 3D Hologram.

Where are we? We are a part of that UNIVERSAL BRAIN…all of us, including ISHTAR.

Did you know that all sexual activities ceased when Innana entered the NETHERWORLD. ALL SEX STOPPED!!! There is so much importance given to describing her body that it obviously points to her enjoying her femininity and sexuality.

She put the whole gender thing into flux. See she was supposed to attract Tammuz/DUMUZI like any other Goddess, via sexy clothing, jewellery, makeup, flirtation and a whole lot of other shit. But what does she do? Returning from the underworld, accompanied by demons who must have a mortal in compensation, she fixes the eye of death on her absent-minded partner who is engrossed in affairs of state, and he is chased by the demons of hell, losing his possessions, his genitals and his life. There you have it!

This losing his genitalia is symbolic of his manhood. Did Ishtar take away his manhood by being a full blown woman? Is it true that when a WOMAN/SACRED FEMININE finds her true power, no man can subdue her. In the world of patriarchy that means a man has lost his manhood. There is no BALANCE you see. IN PATRIARCHY THERE IS NO EQUALITY!

Innana challenged that concept and I think that is super cool. And of course, she is the GODDESS OF HEALING….So she is an archetypal energy I seek to invoke. She never minced her words. Surely not a diplomat. We see this when she speaks to the Gatekeeper of the Netherworld. She is deciding to go where no one is permitted, yet, she speaks with so much authority. I mean that could be misconstrued as a bad thing, but it may not be so.

Patriarchy has oppressed us women for so long, that some of us have become inherently REBELLIOUS. Turning Camus on his head- if patriarchy is ABSURD, then how do we react to it? With rebellion of course. Now more than even we need to collect all the broken female hearts and make them into ART.

Which of your lovers have you loved forever? Which of your Little Shepherds has continued to please you? Come, let me name your lovers for you! … (col. 2:) … for TAMMUZ, the lover of your youth. Year after year you set up a wailing for him. You loved the mauve-colored `shepherd bird’: but you seized him and broke his wing …. So you would love me in my turn, and, as with them, set my fate….” This is from the epic of Gilgamesh. Here we see how Gilgamesh is actually afraid of Ishtar’s advances for he FEARS THE INTENSITY OF HER LOVE. He is worried that ISHTAR will emasculate him and erase his name from History.

This trope is also common in the patriarchal discourse…a woman’s love! DANGEROUS. FICKLE. “Young men’s love then lies not truly in their hearts, but in their eyes.”  This quote by Shakespeare elucidates the MALE GAZE perfectly well. Has it changed? Men will love with their eyes. So girls look good. It’s not in their hearts. Men are of course heartless jerks(sarcasm, I know the EVOLVED MAN archetype very well).

Maya Angelou rings true to my mind…A wise woman wishes to be no one’s enemy; a wise woman refuses to be anyone’s victim. Will be bringing to you channelled writings…later on in the day if possible…

 

Right there in my heart

Right there you sat

In my heart

Could I have known that?

I might’ve, but I did not.

 

You were there in all my embraces

In my deepest dark

I felt you in the Cosmic forces

You stood in my mind

Naked, stark.

 

Deep is my love

Deeper my regret

Deep within you shove

Deeper goes my hatred

But all along you sat there

Right there you sat

In my heart.14068184_1079833532101930_3347540548721964662_n

#redshame

 I have always suffered like crazy during my periods. I mean CRAZY. Batshit crazy. The pain, the ache, the nausea, the migraine. I cannot explain to you how much I suffered. I grew up eating meat, fish and eggs. All the pain and messiness associated with my monthlies made me dread the. Sometimes they were erratic. Sometimes they were on time and all of the times my chums knocked me the fuck out.

After I turned eighteen and I was seriously practising  yoga, I began to seek explanations for my continued menstrual problems. It automatically happened. Me giving up meat, fish, eggs. I still took dairy. Now all my life I was getting afflicted with headaches. If you ask me, that is the only thing that troubles me. My migraine. 

So giving up all the shit and sticking to a vegetarian diet was the first step towards healing some of that period pain. But still it did not go away. Homeopathic no. Ayurveda no. Nothing worked. After much research and studying, after understanding how sexuality has been so perverted and femininity has been so badly suppressed and exploited that I realised that my period pains were nothing but physical manifestation of my spiritual issues. Like not being in touch and connected to my sacred feminine self.

I abhorred periods and everything to do with it. I shunned it and cursed it. How could there not be pain? Pain is an external manifestation of the psycho-spiritual issues. So the journey began with trying to make that connection.

I began to speak to my uterus as soon as the ache began. I began to invite the blood to gush out. I requested my internal mechanism to flush out the unnecessary. It took years, patience and dedication and a sacred intent to pay homage to my blood and my uterus for making me a woman, a mother. Since I believe in doing my healing through journaling and then meditation, I began to write about the experience of being a woman.

I began to see patterns, thought waves, attitudes, misogyny, patronising condescension..I saw it all. How society has made a mockery of womanhood. How we have become reduced to only shadows of our former selves. We are mothers and women yes, but essentially we are humans. The world sees us through the lens of lust and possession. How then can we have an authentic connection to our femininity?

It is that very thing that will make us slaves…to the structure. How do we embrace it? I know the complexities are numerous and each step I took, I thought I’d never be able to break away from this oppressive patriarchy. Judging, condemning, stifling…there is no way out.

I think mind explorations with psylocybin made me see myself as more than a woman. I saw myself as a part of the great SPIRIT. Yes the lifebreath of us all. Using meditation and mental techniques, psychedelics and Mandala making, I think I could break away from the feeling of being a woman. Because boy, it is stressful! I try to look at people as humans too, not men or women. I give them equal opportunity and space to discover them. No gender bias. It took years and years of self work. On myself and my projection of energy.

Connecting to my sacred feminine blood was such an inspiring journey. It changed my life. There have been ancient secret rites and rituals with menstrual blood. In Sumer, in Egypt, in Babylon. In India too. Yoni tantra. It speaks of the sacred power of the  yoni. It is a symbol of the GREAT MOTHER and if invoked correctly, she is a storehouse of LIFE and POWER.

I don’t talk to you from the POV of Tantra. As a tantric. I speak to you as a fellow human who has done some research on this taboo topic from which we all could benefit. So since menstrual blood, sex and all the connected things are so frowned upon, but its something that society is obsessed with to the point of sickness. Sex is such an important part of our lives yet it is so suppressed. But I knew that this pain had to do with an unhealthy relationship to the vagina and the uterus. So what does that mean?

I had an unhealthy relationship to my being female. Years and years of social conditioning and being with people who enable patriarchy, knowingly or unknowingly, I have begun to feel shame and pain because I am a woman. And that has translated to this intense pain and suffering.

I know how many of you are suffering. This is a mental exercise you can do. Try it. Before you start menstruating, write a welcome note to it. Invite the periods to flow. Preparation.

When you get it, touch your vagina softly, knead it and then take some blood in your hands and say I love you and thank you…you are the very life blood of society. You are sacred. You are life itself. I invite the cosmic creative spirit to endow me with fertility and creativity. Be open to receive psychic messages. Your yoni will be energised.

Basically make up something that works for you. Send love vibes to your uterus. It works. There are numbers that I also worked with and switchwords. I also use energy circles. But the maximum healing took place when I embraced my pain. I know that sounds crazy. I embrace the pain every time and let it teach me what I need to learn. I do not take any meds. Use aromatherapy too. Keep a lapis lazuli near you or wear a pendant as you start menstruating. Essential oils also work wonders. Get your partner to give you a full body massage with a carrier oil mixed with some lavender. This could be amazing and what follows could open you up to so much…surreal shit! 

In fact the root cause of not being able to have a baby is spiritual and can be healed by creating an authentic relationship with your vagina. The menstrual blood is used in many tantric practises as a symbol of creation. If everything is energy, then your intent to befriend your vagina will create ripples in the hologram. THE PAIN IS A GHOST OF OUR HATES AND ISSUES. You can repeatedly touch your vagina and express thanks. Just watch where you are at…lol!

 This will give you the power and determination and cosmic shove to become a better version of yourself. This reconnect with the vag is tremendously healing to the psyche.

 Men too can connect to their phallus. We are all humans and we work on the same principle. Both the vagina and the penis have been vilified. They represent abusive words. That’s where our sacred sexuality has been degraded to. Cunt is not an abuse. Dick is not an abuse. Let’s shift anger and loathing away from our body parts. They are parts of us, sacred and divine.

 

I began to feel this way. I began to truly imbibe these ideas in my real life. Not think of my vagina as something repulsive, but as a powerhouse of creativity. AND MY PAIN WENT AWAY…I mean I still feel slightly sick and if I’m out and working, I feel very drained. It takes me a few hours to recover. I do feel sleepy. But I keep on the work through yogasanas, essays, a little self acceptance ritual I do. I also use a no shame dance…that helps me shed all my inhibitions and truly connect to the divine feminine within. That is how I channel her.

 My libido was scarily absent after I gave birth and had a no show going for two years. My child is breastfed and I had no periods for twenty seven months. Yes the dance of horniness was erased from my memory. It took self love, self pleasure, meditation and a whole lot of chilling the fuck out and I began to feel the flow. I know how hard it is for some mothers to get back a hundred percent in the sack, so I suggest you try some of the methods I mentioned. Always feel free to contact me as your life coach if you feel the need.

 This ritual in its totality is ever evolving, so I can show you the basics only. You will have to use your creativity and intuition to keep adapting it to suit your needs. You can use journaling, flashcards, write poetry or essays, meditate, use crystals, in fact use multiple tools and modalities available to do this.

 Use Jade and Moonstone to clear problems associated with it. For example if you have some other issue and menstruation is only a part of it. Use Lapis Lazuli for pain relief. Rose quartz also works. But I use Lapis Lazuli as I channel and meditate on MEDICINE BUDDHA, SANGYE MENLA. WORKS WONDERS!!! Oh, oh of course watch your diet. I am unable to do this sometimes. The craving gets too intense due to hormonal fluctuations…

Of course you can work with herbs. They are magical I tell you. Medical Marijuana is the miracle cure for cramps. Yay to that. Whoopee Goldberg has made tampons with cannabis. I have never used them, but they must be amazing. They deal with the pain without any offensive side effects. Of course Ginger caked in some Himalayan pink salt is very effective. Raspberry and chamomile tea always work for me. And then of course the fennel water. Cinnamon always works for me with everything, so….

The way I have managed to RELEASE so much pain is through more self awareness of myself as a sexual being who is feminine. I am a woman. I have a uterus. So I will bleed. Why should I hate it? I know its messy, but its a part of ME.

 It’s your creative force building and then purging…so sublime!!! Humanity and its systems are seriously mysterious and mesmerising. Periods are a biological process, but why are we humans if we reduce it to just that. It is our job to make connections, to see patterns, to cut and mould and we keep at it.

yoni-relationshipSo do you agree that we need to embrace sacred sexuality and develop a healthy relation to our menstrual cycle?

 

I am that woman

I am that woman you strung up and stoned to death!

I am that woman you beat up black and blue.

I am the commodity you traded in!

I am the menstrual blood of the virgin!

I am the Goddess Kali in full bloom.

I am the beggar girl, no food, clothes or home.

I am sometimes bartered as the wife or the mother,

I am also exchanged as a sister with a dowry.

I am burnt in the fire of your gas,

I am abused and raped by my father when he drinks.

I am the woman on the billboard,

I am the naked porno star and also a WHORE,

I am the mother and the slut,

I am the dirty beggar in my hut.

I am a child bride’s stifled scream,

I am an unwanted mother’s pain and shame.

I am the Devi Durga slaying Mahisasura.

I am Panchali too, in the courtroom being called a slut with five husbands.

I am Hecate, Diana and Innana,

I am a rag picker, tired and dirty on the road.

I am ONE. I am ALL.

I am a woman…a woman, the woman…14729183_1131722546881297_6928179524365019344_n