Mars in Cancer~ Female-led relationships

If you look at FLR it looks like the safest relationship a woman can have. She makes the rules, she sets the boundaries, she has final say and he both loves her and supports her in her role. In any other relationship, women do not enjoy that kind of freedom or safety. This is a functional model for any woman who wants more control and less strife. There should be zero downside to female led relationships when entered into with open eyes and a whole heart between two people who love each other.” — A BBS entry from Asserting leadership

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=female-led%20relationship

With Mars in Cancer, Venus in Taurus, so many planets in the water signs, the energy is very feminine and that makes the ALPHA MALE archetype redundant. Boys, step aside and let the women take the lead. Do not feed into the male are superior bullshit, because they are not.

A female-led relationship, also known as wife-led marriage or loving female authority by its advocates, is where the woman is the married head of the household and makes all the decisions. It is not a thing of whips and chains and leather (though sometimes it does become that!) – it is just a different power arrangement.

Once made equal to man, woman becomes his superior.

—Socrates

It’s  inevitable!

Your man’s inner-voice speaks to him about his ultimate desire to support, protect and please his Goddess. He wants you to BE-come that Goddess! There is nothing like sweet, sweet surrender. Society used to be a matriarchy and a woman could freely choose who she wanted to copulate with. Marriage as we know it and even monogamy did not exist.

Sexual union was spiritual and liberal. There was no slut shaming or name calling. No rumours, no lies. Just pure sacredness of the Union between man and woman.

FEMDOM, the most type of Female led relationships is where a man becomes in a slave to serve his Goddess. He is her toy. This definitely has a tantric oeuvre. In Tantra, the Goddess or Shakti is revered and worshipped. Femdom is sorta like that. Does that excite you as much as it excites me?

Level 3 Female-led relationship

The couple is likely to develop a servant/master type relationship with the woman in charge. The woman takes much greater control of the man, telling him where he can go and when he can go there, who he can talk to, what he can wear, what he can eat, what he can say and when he can speak. She will take control of his money and decide where they are going as a couple. The man forfeits say in just about everything and in most relationships at this level, that’s exactly the way he wants it.

A lot of men are now taking this seriously…and surrendering to the yoni/vagina~

Do you want to?

Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.

—Timothy Leary

The next level mostly moves to fetish and BDSM and now she wants pets and slaves.

Do you know some of the most powerful men in the world are subs and slaves. Not being in control in bed is such a huge turn on for these men. Having his woman play such games with him will drive your man nuts. Believe me.

If your man likes to dress up in your clothes. Dress him up for fuck’s sake, or else he will do it with someone else. Most men fantasise about being dominated by a gorgeous diva. They love it.

Punish him if he has been a bad boy. In fact, female led relationships have been known to make men feel more secure and safe.

A short musing~~

No one had ever squeezed his dick so hard.

And called it a clit.

Humiliated him.

Made him crawl on all fours.

No one had done all those things.

All he wanted to do, was wear her panties.

He was afraid to look in her eyes.

His phone rings again and his heart skips a beat.

She is his top and he, her bottom.

 

She uses and abuses him, she plays with him.

And she never kisses him.

Just that once.

She kissed him, just that once.

His cock hurts and his balls are blue.

But she has now thrown the keys away.

Sometimes taking control in the bedroom becomes very therapeutic for your man. Remember, he is as much a victim of toxic patriarchy as you are. Give him the chance to reveal his most tender side. Try it and become the dominant.

Chastity devise~

Forced chastity is the best part of all this. When your man is full of pent up sexual energy and dependent upon you for its release he is truly at his best. Part of it is chemical/hormonal. Part of it is psychological. Built up sexual energy is exactly that, energy! A normally lazy man who has not had an orgasm in a long time is full of energy. He wants to do things. He needs some way to either express or sublimate that sexual energy. All you have to do is tell him the things he needs to do. He’ll do them!

Let him be all fluffy and express himself. Let his BE HIMSELF. Let his drop all the masks he wears. Please discuss it with him.

Embrace him with all your heart.

Introduce him to anal play if you haven’t already. A man can only have a full bodied orgasm, if his Gspot is activated and that is up the anus. You have to finger his through the backdoor. lol! So to speak. Unsure? Email me.

Playing the Top in bed can be challenging for you if you are a sub. Then by all means ignore this. But if you are like me, then read on.

Showing your man that you are the very embodiment of Black Moon Lilith will initiate a new relationship dynamics between you both. Remember that. I for one have been studying the art of Japanese bondage or Shibari for the last five years. Love it! BTW I am not the one tied up, I do the tying up! Lol!

Men like to be mothered. Haha! Don’t be sick, read on.

Men like women to be in control, whether they are ready to face it or not.

Take control tonight as Mars is still in Cancer. He will be sensitive and open. More connected to his feminine side. Overpower him, but do it convincingly.

Open up to him and tell him your fantasies. Hear his out too. Speaking honestly is the best way you can preserve your relationship.

Email me for more on this and how FLRs can help you harness the energy of the Goddess.

http://www.tinaheals.com

tina@tinaheals.com

Men’s minds are raised to the level of the women with whom they associate.

—Alexandre Dumas Pere

 

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Politics of Pleasure~

“So really it happens that the more sexual a person is, the more inventive he can be. The more sexual a person is, the more intelligent. With less sex energy, less intelligence exists; with more sexual energy, more intelligence, because sex is a deep search to uncover, not only bodies, not only the opposite sex body, but everything that is hidden.” ~~Osho, The Ultimate Alchemy, Vol. 2, Talk #2

You know the first time you meet someone and you have butterflies in your stomach. That feeling of pure adrenaline. Yes we love it. When we hook up with a stranger we are attracted to, we get a huge kick of adrenaline. It is tempestuous. It makes us go weak in the knees. But there is NO SUSTAINABILITY and interest wears off as soon as the thrill is dead. Why does the thrill die? FAMILIARITY!!!

This type of sex is dependent on the release of the hormone adrenaline which makes us thrill seekers can be quite challenging. It was for me at least. Haha. This type of sex can often result in humiliation, disgrace, feeling cheap and used. There is no internal bonding. There is no spiritual connectivity.

The very antithesis of this is the type of sex that we need to bring into our lives. This type of sex involves love, care, trust, respect and FAMILIARITY. The main ingredient of this type of copulation is harmony and synchronicity between couples. This type of sex is about GIVING not so much about RECEIVING. That does not mean that you do not receive. For  you receive way more. You receive surrender.

When you pleasure your partner without thinking of you own wants and desires, then you show them their importance and that in turn makes them open up in ways you can never anticipate. They will surrender not just their bodies, but their minds and souls to you.

When you truly connect with another human being and create sexual energy which can heal and transform you completely, then you release the chemical OXYTOCIN. What is that? Well that is the BONDING HORMONE. When a mother gives birth, she releases the most amount of oxytocin ever released by a human so she can lactate and breastfeed.

In fact this is the reason why men are so interested in the breasts and of course the breast is a pleasure trove for the woman as the nerve endings are connected to her clitoris. Therefore men have been stimulating the breasts since time immemorial. No couple abstains from breast play in some form or the other.

The sex that releases oxytocin in the brain is what exists between husband and wife and between long-term partners. But as we are flooded with pornography and ready to consume internet sexual content, we are detaching more and more from our natural partners.

Too many families are breaking apart because the couple is so busy bringing up the children or making a career that they have ignored to cultivate SACRED sexual chemistry. The result is infidelity. The main reason for this is that they do not enjoy each other any more. Because they have not taken the time and the effort required to make sex excitable and enjoyable with a long term partner. It is not easy. It required loads of work and a steadfast commitment. But wait it is not just boring. It can be so rewarding! Trust me! I know.

Men are rampantly cheating on women. Of course women are too. But we see this play out more in the masculine archetypes. This is such a sorry state of affairs for too many women are conditioned to not take sex seriously. They are taught that it is something they have to “give” their husbands. Why? Because he needs it. Yes that is what I have heard from so many women. Most of them consider sex a part of marital duties and derive little pleasure from it. Fuckity fuck!

Women have been so badly slut shamed and called names that they have repressed their sexual desires. When in reality, women are extremely sexual creatures. Look at their anatomy. Women have been designed to enjoy sex and let no one tell you otherwise.

A woman is not a slut or a whore if she is sexually empowered. A woman who is in touch with her sexual energy and knows how to work it is truly a wondrous individual. For she is the true epitome of the GODDESS energy. She knows what pleasures her and she knows how to get it. She craves for no man, because she is self sufficient in every way.

Yes she does seek her MASCULINE, her YANG, her partner, her polarity. But she is no damsel in distress waiting for him. She is a Goddess. She is not afraid to speak her mind. She is not afraid to explore her psyche. She is not afraid to say openly that it is normal for women to want sex.

Yet, while gathering data for my book, I discovered so many couples barely have sex twice a month. I’m talking about 30 somethings. Both husband and wife are so busy with work that they barely manage to get a quickie in once in two weeks. There is hardly much foreplay involved and most of the time, she does not orgasm.

She does not care. Why bother about orgasm? He is happy right. Grunting and moaning while he climaxes. The pleasure she has given him is enough. Right? Why does she need to orgasm?

Well, well, well ladies. If you are caught in this BS, then take it from a woman who takes her orgasms very seriously. You do not know what you are missing. For both men and women are capable of full bodied orgasms which can make them transcend space and time.

There is such a sense of UNITY. There is such a sense of bliss and the act in itself has now become sacred. This is the Goddess energy all women need to channel. They need to become the GODDESS who must have her pleasure taken care of. And that includes your man knowing how to get you to orgasm….yummy full bodied orgasms. Oh, oh, oh…did you know that orgasms activate the VAGUS NERVE. Google it if you don’t know that the fuck that is.

You can bring back the magic in your love life with your partner even after decades of marriage. In fact when you start to practice oxytocin based sex, then you will see how strong your bond will become.

You must be ready to forget all about your own pleasure guys if you want to worship the Goddess. She is the symbol of the GREAT COSMIC YONI/VAGINA. She is the MOTHER MATRIX. So worship her with all your devotion and think only of pleasuring her. Get creative.

Remember the orgasm part itself is only a tiny part of the show. In many cases it is not even the finale. Instead the sexual union should make your consciousness merge with that of your partner. In totality. Like nothing exists outside of you. Like nothing ever did and nothing ever will. Can you imagine that? TIMELESSNESS! Yes transcendental sex magic can make you transcend your EGO-SELF or the conscious mind.

For hidden in the deep recesses of the UNCONSCIOUS lie all the archetypes. And we get a chance to break away from our standard archetype for that moment when we are in union. You know why magick works? It is because in the netherworld of our psyche there exists all the information. From all our previous experiences and I mean collectively. Jung called it the COLLECTIVE UNCONSCIOUS. From this we channel all the wisdom and guidance.

Once we have understood the archetypes we can break away from them and step into new exploring new archetypes. We can change the role we play for who else ifs the DIRECTOR of this film called life but us?

Couples who seek to explore sex magic or tantric sex, there are some tips for you from my end. Firstly find TIME. The most important ingredient that society lacks. TIME. We are slaves to it. Sex magic can never be done without time. At least three hours. Don’t fall off that chair. Hold on.

Create a sacred space. Full body massages for both from both. Oh yeah! Bring on the oils baby. Burn that intense and light those candles. Put on that music. Guys you can do an adaptation of the Yoni Puja. I wrote about it briefly in this article. Check it out. Just do what works for you. What speaks to you.

https://mywritestuffblog.wordpress.com/2017/04/03/libra-full-moon10th-april-2017-love-takes-time/

If you are interested to know more about sexual alchemy and greater harmony with your partner, then email me- tina@tinaheals.com

http://www.tinaheals.com

A SEXUALLY EMPOWERED PERSON IS SUPER CONFIDENT, BUT NOT COCKY. She or he owns the stage and does it effortlessly.

I am offering special workshops for women called GODDESS AWAKENING where I will be discussing vital components of pleasuring your partner and also self pleasure. So please ping me. These are available in groups and individually too. LET US END THE WAR ON NATURE AND ON OUR OWN BODIES.

alchemical-sun-moon

Charged astro: Venus in Aries RX, Do things differently!

Her image had passed into his soul for ever and no word had broken the holy silence of his ecstasy. Her eyes had called him and his soul had leaped at the call.
To live, to err, to fall, to triumph, to recreate life out of life!
A wide angel had appeared to him… an envoy from the fair courts of life, to throw before him in an instant of ecstasy the gates of all the ways of error and glory.”… James Joyce

Venus had disappeared into the heart of the Sun to be reborn as the morning star. Retrograde in Aries, firing up my poets’ soul. Igniting intense aching of love and sensuality. Did you ever feel that you no longer exist? That you have successfully dropped you EGO or I construct? During an orgasm?

If you have never felt the wild fires of sensuality assault the very fabric of your senses, then it is now the perfect time to ALLOW yourself to experience something so intense and passionate that it will change the way you look at the world forever!

With so much of activity in fiery Aries, we can be assured of one thing. We are ready to ignite! Now you could use this fiery energy to set fire to your sheets. Seriously! Why channel this into something destructive? I mean fire always does not have to destroy? Does it? Where would we be without fire? Think about it! The dichotomy of life. Nothing by itself is evil or good. We make it so with our perspectives. We give meaning to phenomena.

So what meaning are you ready to give to the astro? Venus disappears from our view and it is at this time that our UNCONSCIOUS becomes fertile with this alchemical marriage. There is so much scope for transmutation. Dark Moon Lillith in SAGITTARIUS is trining Retro Venus in ARIES and squares the NORTH Node in VIRGO and the SOUTH NODE in PISCES who is asking us to uphold INDIVIDUAL INTEGRITY!

Ah, the impetuosity! Our reactions and thoughts are spontaneous. Remember that our libidos are fired up, no matter who or where you are! So even if you are in a long-term thing, you might suddenly develop the roving eye! Stop beating yourself up about it. Instead be honest with your partner and try to find ways to spice up your intimate time.

Just wanted to say that while Venus is in this position, normal missionary sex will be boring. Even doggy-style is for the yesteryear. So if your beau is unable to keep the erection, then it might be a good time to start exploring other options like prostate play.

The prostate is a walnut-sized gland that surrounds the urethra and houses the male G SPOT. You can find innovative ways to stimulate it with oils and massage. The male is able to feel full bodied orgasms that are impossible during hetero penetration.

The other spicy ingredient you can add and must add to your sexual experiences is roleplaying. If you’ve not done it, then go ahead and do it. As simple as that. I am not going to chart out elaborate sexual fantasies here. Lol! Find what turns you on the most and do it. This Astro is so helpful to chip away at redundant sexual mores and traditions. Changing the dynamics of sexual play can be extremely fulfilling. Venus in Aries RX is urging us to become child-like in our innocence and purse such things with a rabid freshness.

There is a sexual revolution brewing in the air. The WILD WOMAN archetype is awakening. She is a carrier of the Ancient Feminine Spirit and Venus Retrograde will help you channel that energy. Venus retro is a direct symbol of ACTIVE REBELLION. She is not SUBMISSIVE. She is the DOMINANT!

In retro she shows us how to shift our perspectives from the pleasant and often over simplified rendition of her archetype and pushes us to explore deeper. What does it mean to be feminine? What does it mean to be WILD? WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO FEEL DOMINANT? If you’re a guy you might consider what it would feel to give your partner complete control for one time while you’re in bed with her. Think of her doing whatever she wants to do and you have no say in it.

I think this is very healthy to UNLEARN toxic patriarchal traditions, customs and mores. We humans have to give each other the respect to try all roles. Men who are control freaks need to understand that there is nothing as healing as letting your woman take charge of your sexual experiences, for with her intuitive wisdom she can really catapult your sexual growth. Of course she must be adequately inspired to be trained or to train herself in such matters.

I suggest that all coupes try reversing roles in bed. Try once to begin with and see how it feels. Pegging can be extremely exciting for men, because your G-SPOT is activated. Actually it is called P-SPOT for guys.When a male is anally penetrated by his woman, he can begin to UNLEARN and relearn different facets of sexual expression. Women, if your guy wants to be pegged, remember that he is placing huge amounts of trust in you. Use a double-ended dildo for the woman to feel physical stimulation.

Guys you need to begin pleasuring your woman with your mouth and hands if you are doing so already. You can even buy her crystal eggs which you can use during a yoni massage. But be sure to earn the technique before you attempt this.

Venus in retro reshuffles our needs in the areas of all things Venutian- money, sex, arts, beauty…and she offers a realignment. To the individual and to the collective! We need to drop our calcified concepts and impassioned we need to reinvent our relationship with money, sex and the arts.

Think of this deeply…how are you holding yourself back from experiencing more of the Venusian energy in your life? Are you tired of the way you experience sex and intimacy? Do you want to take it a notch higher to experience deeper cosmic orgasms? It is up to you.

The New Moon in Aries is also giving you ample manifestation power to make things work in your favour. Go out into the world and kiss the sky!

Oh, oh, oh…before I go…every encounter that you experience is FATED. Karmic! Accept it all as sacred and as spiritual debt and pay it forward…with love and empathy!

If you’re single and ready to mingle, then you might want to summon your partner with the help of a Switchword phrase. BRING-PERFECT-MAGIC-VENUS-LOVE-CHARM. Venus might decide to grant you a boon and send you your twinflame. Who knows?

Venus favours the bold… Ovid

email me – tina@tinaheals.com

http://www.tinaheals.com

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